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When Did You Last Have a Conversation With Your True Self?

woman-looking-in-mirror

Many people have two distinct personalities: the one that is who they truly are and the one that they pretend to be for other people. Whether it is because of business, religion, or other responsibilities, many people adopt a distinct personality that they put on like they do their new outfit in the morning. When this is done repetitively enough, it is easy to believe that this adopted persona is really the true self. Does this sound like you? When did you last have a conversation with the person you really are instead of the person you believe you need to be?

Sometimes You Just Have To Stop Doing

Even though it is easy to adopt a different personality to show people, the true self still tries to speak with each person. The problem that many people face in speaking with their true selves is that they are too busy doing things or thinking about things to listen to what it is saying. The distractions and preoccupations of life make it really easy to ignore what the true self is try to say as well. In order to tune out the distractions and set aside an adopted personality for awhile, it is imperative to become still and quiet everything else that is demanding attention. That’s why meditation is such an important part of the process of speaking with one’s true self.

The Physical Benefits of Meditation Are Numerous

Meditation does more than just reduce stress levels or allow someone to get in touch with what their true self is trying to tell them. Just 30 minutes of meditation per day can help someone:

  • better cope with an illness,
  • boost the immune system, and
  • improve your overall mental balance.

Many people who practice meditation on a daily basis find an overall level of happiness because even though they may need to adapt to changing circumstances during the day, they have a chance to also check in with their true selves during the day at some point as well. With a mental balance, less stress, and a chance at better creativity, the tough days generally seem a little less difficult.

You Can Meditate Almost Anywhere!

Many people believe that meditation requires a quiet room, sitting in some yoga posture, and forming the letter “O” with their middle finger and thumb while they chant something. Though that may be the classic pose for meditation, the good news is that meditation can happen virtually anywhere:

  • You can meditate while taking a hike somewhere.
  • You can meditate while taking a shower.
  • You can meditate while strolling through a quiet garden.
  • You can mediate while sitting back with your favorite music.

What matters more than the kind of meditation that someone chooses to practice is the fact that they are making the effort to meditate in the first place. It is the act of meditation that brings someone to listen to their true selves. How that actually occurs is unique to the individual.

4 ways to stop comparing yourself with others

How often do you compare yourself to others? Sadly, many of us spend and waste lots of time and energy comparing ourselves to others. Oftentimes we end up feeling inferior to people based on our own self judgment and hyper-criticism. However, we also may find ourselves feeling superior to some of the people around us, based on certain aspects of our lives and careers we think are going well and/or the specific struggles of the people in our lives.

Mike Robbins writes about 4 ways to stop the comparison trap.

4 tips to train our brains to be more positive

Experts say that when faced with despair and hopelessness, we can physically train our brains to grasp the positive. Research suggests we can actually retrain our brains, physically alter them by being more positive and consciously recognizing and acknowledging the positives around us.

This article from the Chicago Tribune offers the following 4 tips to do that:

1. Write down three positive things about your life each day.

2. Never speak ill of yourself or your loved ones.

3. If you have five negative thoughts in your mind, do not say them out loud. Replace them with five positive thoughts and meditate on those.

4. If you fear something, acknowledge it, accept the uncertainty of it, let it go and don’t dwell on it.

11 ways to protect yourself from negative influences

Everything that we do in life requires a certain level of energy. The more energy we have the more we can achieve in our lives. We lose the most energy from our interactions with others – especially people that are energy vampires.

Energy vampires drain your spirit by depleting your positive energy, just like real vampires slurp blood. Energy vampires – such as drama queens – leave you feeling drained and listless. You know you’ve spent time with an energy vampire when you leave feeling depressed, exhausted, or sad. Energy vampires drain your positive energy for their own use. Energy vampires leave you feeling empty and sluggish. My best advice is to avoid or minimize your contact with these people. Here are 11 tips to deal with these people.

Why you need to embrace change

Most people don’t like change because they fear the unknown. That’s why people stay in bad relationships, dead-end jobs, and live unhappy lives. However, when your inner voice and heart tell you to make a change in your life and you don’t, you feel a lot of stress, frustration and unhappiness. For example, let’s say 5 years ago, you were happy working at your current job. Everything was going well. Today, you have lost the enthusiasm for your job you felt 5 years ago. Your inner voice is telling you to go do something else. If you follow your inner voice and heart you will be happy. If you don’t, you will be miserable and continue to free stressed and frustrated.

You need to embrace change. The fact is you are changing all the time. You are not a fixed self. For example, your cells change in your body every seven years. Your mind changes all the time: it is always moving and shifting. Who you were a year ago is no longer who you are today. Take a moment to examine the areas of your life that give you a lot of stress or unhappiness. One of the reasons why you feel stress and unhappiness is because your inner voice and heart want you to make a change but you haven’t done it yet.

When you are hungry you begin to feel all of the physical and emotional sensations of hunger. Once you satisfy your hunger, you feel better. Your inner voice gets hungry once in a while. If you feed that hunger, you will be happy. If you don’t you will feel physical and emotional pain. You need to embrace the fact that you are always changing. What makes you happy now might be different than what made you happy a year ago. If you follow your inner voice and change you will be happy. A great Chinese philosopher said, “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

8 tips to deal with grief

Grief happens to all of us at some time in our lives. You may think that grief happens only after the death of a loved one, but you also grieve after any major change in your identity such as losing a job, divorce, kids going off to college, or moving. No matter the cause, grief can be one of the hardest experiences of your life. Not only can grief feel emotionally unpredictable, but it is often physically and mentally stressful and exhausting. The following tips can help you mindfully navigate the path of grief.

Wisdom increases with age

We live in a youth culture. We live in a society where old people are considered sick, senile and stupid. But from my point of view, the older you get the wiser you become if you lived an intelligent life. In many cultures around the world, old people are the most respected members of the community. This article talks about why growing old is the best years of a person’s life.

How to conquer bad habits

Do you have a bad habit that you want to break but you can’t? I found this article to be spot on in describing why it can be so hard to break bad habits. Here is an excerpt from the article:

We all suffer from habits that prevent us from being who we want to be. Extensive research has shown that stress perpetuates bad habits. Trying to change a habit while stressed is like trying to put off a fire with gasoline. It is just not going to happen. The first thing to address then, when trying to change a habit, is stress reduction.

4 Ways to control excessive worrying

I used to worry a lot about the future and what is going to happen to me. Excessive worrying is a complete drain of energy. Worrying is an unhealthy behavior that causes us so much unhappiness. People who excessively worry do not live life to the fullest because they spend most of their emotional energy imagining something that might not happen. Here are some ways to control worrying:

Make a list of your worries

Write down everything that you are worrying about. Look at whether your worry is productive or unproductive. A productive worry is one that you can do something about right now. By contrast, an unproductive worry is one which you can’t do anything about.

Meditate
When a state of worrying occurs, meditation is one of the best ways to help decrease those feelings that are felt throughout the body. At least 5-15 minutes of meditation, once or twice a day can help clear the mind, slow the heart rate, and ease the uncomfortable feelings associated with anxiety.

When the body is in a state of worry, breathing tends to become unsteady. By relaxing and concentrating on breathing, the body tends to calm. During meditation, the mind should be focused on the inhale and exhale – slowly in and out. This technique directs the mind to something else rather than on the cause of the worrying. Meditation also helps regulate breathing which can become irregular when anxious.

Release the Worry
There are different ways that one can release the excessive worrying from the body. Some may choose to talk to a close friend, family member, or even a therapist. Someone who is a close confident can offer support and even solutions to a problem. Often times, just releasing the problem verbally can make the worry not seem as overwhelming. It can also be comforting to just have someone understand that the problem is not their own.

For people that prefer to keep their problems private, writing down the cause of the worry and any thoughts associated with the problem can be a form of release. Often times, writing down the reason for a person’s worry can put perspective on the situation.

Let It Go
For people that worry often, letting go can be a challenge. That’s why it is important to learn techniques to release the worry. Two common phrases that one should say when overcome with worry are “this too shall pass” and “what’s the worst that can happen?”

When asking oneself “what’s the worst that can happen?” write down the different scenarios of the situation. Worrying can often become overwhelming because of the unexpected. When the possible outcomes of the problem is brought to light, the worrying can become less extensive because one is prepared for the “unexpected.”

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